Renew, Restore — Awaken!

the waterfall of Life

the waterfall of Life

This is not about computers, friends. I’m talking about the journey we all share, propelled by our inexorably searching human spirit. Each and everyone of ours. And I’m not referring to the search for the next-leader of Al Qaeda, either. I’m talking about how some of us are quite obsessed (others, not so much) to discover the “inside scoop” that makes us all tick. The bottom line. The matrix, the skinny — ahhh, The Mystery. Myself, I call the phenomenon of “the Secret of Life” just what it is: The Mystery. Native Americans call it that name, as well as Great Spirit, a more specific reference to both its tremendousness and its unknow-ability. Call It what you may, The Mystery about sums up what we definitely know about “the meaning of life.” After all, who really knows? People say they’ve “seen the Light” when they’ve had an NDE. I’ve met several individuals who attest to the exact same experience (the tunnel, the Light) after having died and then, been miraculously revived. One NDE-friend of mine is literally a “rocket scientist” who drowned when he was 5: not the sort to exaggerate, by any means. His experience set him on a lifelong journey to discover The Mystery. The other was a motorcyclist friend, a bit more flamboyant, his character a tad more doubtable … but both told me they had the exact same experience, if only for fleeting moments. They literally stood in, and felt, the presence of The Mystery. This skin-chilling story seems to be universally the same as all other NDEs I’ve read about.

And isn’t this exactly what forms the basis of all the world’s religions? To answer some of the questions humans hold about what’s to happen to us when we die? I think so! Religion — all religions, from Christianity, Judaism and Islam, to Buddhism and Ba’hai, they all represent “heaven insurance” for their followers. For others, myself included, subscribing to a spiritual philosophy such as I do (being a meditator, a mystic, a yogi-recovery-Catholic) brings for me an automatic entry ticket to be a member of a “tribe” instead of being the lone rogue I once was; or worse, delegated to those “tribes” who claim no belief in anything, void of any mystery or “magic” in this earthly life at all. For me, life would be dull and awfully scarry without this innate search for The Mystery we’re all confronted with. To have a search means we get to discover many insights, answers, and follow the beacons of Light we’re presented with. I have found many answers in my own search, and they satisfy my longing-to-know. The answers all reside within my own human spirit, as they do in yours … our lovely, beating, awakened-human hearts.

Join me as I tell the story of Tyson Leela’s adventures to reclaim her having once experienced “It” after she loses that inside connection. Heart Island: a trilogy of transformation coming soon to you in eBooks and POD. check out the books’ progress:

Sending waves of Light and Love to each and every one of you,

your pal Lordflea

Thinking Outside the Box

My thoughts have been centered on just that lately — how to think, and then, act! — by expanding my awareness of how things really are, outside the box. This effort has been thrust upon me by a series of events in my own life — but each and every one of us, and collectively as nations, and even broader, as a unified family of humanity must face the same dilemma, sooner or later — how to take that next step when the old ways just don’t work anymore.

what to do, what to do: where to turn, whom to trust ... on and on

what to do, what to do: where to turn, whom to trust ... on and on

Have you ever come to that point in your life when you realize that things have been shown (or abruptly ripped from you, in cases like what I’ve just gone through) that make it more than obvious (if one can reflect upon such situations) that the Universe is telling you (sometimes shouting) “It’s time to change! Get off your ass! C’mon! Think outside the box and do life another way, sweetheart!“? Well, this is just where I’ve traveled, and I’m here to report that whatever happens during the process of change, however painful it is (and always is) the new perception of life that we are given as a result of assessing, and then eliminating painful non-functioning parts of our lives (in other words–removing destructive habits, abusive friends, oppressive situations, etc) always leads us closer to Truth.

What is Truth?

Ahhhhhh, the Great Mystery of Life.

Always hard to talk and write about … easier to demonstrate with visuals. Allow me to share my feelings about life’s Great Mystery, the only thing worth striving for, in my humble Lordflea-ism approach to this whirling ball of blue we all share, here in the vastness of space:

all of us ... cells of Oneness

all of us ... cells of Oneness

so what i’m saying is….if anyONE or anyTHING prevents me from feeling connected to this Mystery, this vast, beautiful, oh-so-real connectedness between all living beings and all in existence … whether alive or only in pure energy form that’s also called consciousness … then I know it’s time to make a change.

This has happened to me recently: I was verbally assaulted by someone close to me, unprovoked. Someone whom you’d never in a million years think could be capable of such outlandishly bad, disrespectful, and mortifying low behavior. But shit happens. Some of us are not as mentally and emotionally well as others. Some of us haven’t yet worked out our fears and angers, as was the case with this person. How can one determine when you’re being abused? Because it feels you’ve run against (or are one of them, actually) folks like THIS! (again, words are difficult … visuals easier, better, more universal, don’t you think?):

close-hearted folks, i call "rock people"

close-hearted folks, i call "rock people"

in my case I realized I’d been unnecessarily assailed and found that totally unacceptable. I’ve worked too hard, too long on getting to a place of inner peace to allow someone else to abuse me, much less ever abusing myself anymore. I don’t allow people, places, or things to abuse me. If I feel i’m being treated “less than” the gloriously attuned person I’ve worked so hard to become (i’m not bragging, honestly! this is the fruits of my long and dedicated efforts at meditation, yogic practices, and seeing “God in Each Other”) … then I make a change. In my case, I had to de-friend this individual, as kindly, though as directly, as possible, and only after seeing there was no recourse to a high-minded conciliatory effort on the part of myself and the abuser. When someone cannot even SEE that they are abusing, you have to retreat. As fast, as far as possible. Otherwise one’s wishes to merge with the Mystery are forever being daunted, and we, as emotional humans, have a much harder time of living in our hearts and soaring with the union of All Like-Minded-Ones. Like this — an example of how it feels, what can happen to us-former “Rock People” if we only allow our fears and misgivings to evaporate:

we are ONE ... feel IT

we are ONE ... feel IT

Of course this is a metaphor. We’re not all actually angels. But we all do all have an angelic nature as well as a perfectly devilish one.

Which one are you living by today?

Which side of your dual-nature do you aspire to reside in, to enjoy its fruits: bitter or sweet?

The devilish one, where you feel insecure, anxious, scared, judgmental, and not sure of the Mystery? Or ….

Your angelic side, in which you smile inwardly at how close you are, actually, truthfully, to being a Part of the Mystery, continuously, intrinsically … innately?

Fortunately, each of us is given the choice. And if you’re in a situation where you feel you don’t have the luxury of that choice, it’s time to either RUN away, start afresh, or ASK for help. We are here to help others. Nothing is impossible if we do it all together.

My last thought for today, dear friends, munch on this:

we are all interconnected cells within the Body of the Mystery

we are all interconnected cells within the Body of the Mystery

Love and Light from Lordflea

if you’d like please check out my novel, which I’m uploading chapter by chapter while I’m preparing it’s eBook publication:

AND … my NEW website that explores the Mystery a little more via words and visuals, a la Lordflea

Staring at my feet


the importance of what i spend my time doing the most of has been central in my thinking of late. y’know: you are what you eat, and you certainly become what you think. that’s why i haven’t been bloggin’ as of late. wanted to keep centered in my heart, and not just spew, at least for the sake of spewing.

i do this occasionally. withdraw and feel life living me, instead of trying to be so active, so concerned, so consumed with “other” that i forget this experience of life itself. here’s another way of looking at it:

the interconnectedness of All

the interconnectedness of All

all i have is my self, and my Self–the little me that squirms with responsibilities and worries, and the big Me that knows there is more to this life than i’ll ever know…and to feel the majesty, the magic, the wonder of it all is more than enough for me to be concerned about. certainly enough upon which to base my creative energies’ pursuits–my arting, as i call it, whether i paint, draw, make a garden, a cake, or sew a sail, write a book–or blog.

this feeling of being connected to all came to me as a child. then i lost it. then i rediscovered it later, mostly through working on getting rid of the garbage that my mind collected over the years. now i have trained myself to stay as much as possible in that simple place, that inner place, where the breath connects with even the movement of faraway galaxies, and the knowledge, the Truth of feeling connected is real–this is my daily experience.

the drawing i use as an example shows us all in our “Higher Self”… our so-called “angelic” bodies…that part of our nature that is connected to the Highest good for all. yes–we all have that in our nature, whether you are aware of it or not, whether you exercise that birthright, that ownership of your highest nature, or not.

living in the moment; accepting our sacredness, our divine nature–our Higher Self: this is the way of living i want to share with you, not because of any other reason but my humble offering to help make the world a better place to live in.

we are not all just scrambling around trying to get something to eat, or make happen, or elect, or conquer, or succeed, or even be good at. but yes, we all exisit as individual cells within the larger “thing” that makes up this known reality…what is called the Universe (and some call, simply, “God”).

we're all a part of a whole

we are all One, breathe, and feel: Truth

many other things have passed my mind, and of course i’ve been doing many (many!) other things since my last entry here. don’t worry. some of you who read my blog might think i’m just a holy-roller who only sits around contemplating my navel. but no—-i have a family, a job, lots of social duties, and creatively i’m consumed by writing a nonfiction narrative, illustrated, naturally, which i am debating about uploading here, so i can let you, friends on my web, read as i write, day by day. but…i haven’t decided to or not. ha ha! all i can say for now is…writing this book is certainly my immediate, and main creative focus, not this blog.

my garden has been covered with an entire truckload of mulch, delivered free by a tree-man who took down a big One over at my mother’s place. Carter and i’ve been doing lots of HOT HOT yoga, in our little yoga shed, which i call the santosa shack (santosa being contentment in Sanskrit). we chant, we meditate, we even attend his church, ahhweeee, diversity in God-liness! lots of cooking (made dosas twice this past couple weeks…a lentil and rice fermented east Indian flat bread, terribly exotic tasting, and terribly nutritious because of the legume and grain mixture). what else? oh so much biking, hiking, rehabing my knee, still injured from dancing too fiercely at daughter’s wedding way back in June. injuries take energy. life takes care. time is precious. do i use it wisely? i try to. when i lay my head down on my pillow, i feel rewarded by deep, comforting, beautiful sleep. what a gift, life is.

i will do a page next, i promise, on a subject i’ve been thinking a lot about: what to say to someone who is really, truly, either physically, spiritually, or mentally suffering.  because recently i ran into an old acquaintance, who has all the world at her feet: she’s rich, successful, socially powerful and consciously humanitarian beyond measure—but—she’s absolutely miserable.  the only outer proof, however, is that of her uncontrollable, mind-numbing, self-pitying drinking.  of course she’s in denial about having a drinking problem. and i simply can’t share with her my own experience in that matter (being in alcohol and drug addiction recovery now for my third decade)…but i can post a page here. perhaps one day a chink will open in her tightly-bricked-up facade, and what a person formerly-miserable (me) has to share with another who still is (her), will make a difference.

a little light in the well of darkness, that’s all i attempt to do…with my art, with my words, and now with this public web-spew.

so look on the right hand side in a day or say and you’ll see a new page. those pages stay up, where this post side changes when i enter a new one.

whew! i finally figured that out! now, if only i can find my beautiful color paintings. let me see, let me try again. a treat for you, perhaps?

plants, animals, mineral--we are all One

plants, animals, mineral--we are all One

i love each and every one of you, truly! lord flea