Posts Tagged ‘self love’

Global Bliss NOW

Global Bliss NOW

I want you all to know how essential your CARING for another is, and most importantly, how crucial it is to CARE for yourself, in terms of healing from a disease, condition, or syndrome.

I just read a great article in Harvard (University’s) Magazine about the study of the placebo effect, and how researchers are finding that merely by a patient knowing that someone cares (like the healer, the practitioner) is more effective than what actual medicine he or she receives. (See “The Placebo Pehnomenon” by Cara Feinberg in HarvardMagazine.com)

They prove the phenomenon of mind over matter by following a large group of people, some of whom are given placebos, some even told that the placebos are just that … “they are not medicine, just plain pills.” Even the group that gets placebos does better than the group that gets nothing, not caring they’re being TOLD, then given “pills that don’t work.” In other words: it’s the MENTAL part of the patient’s psychology that helps the healing. Just by knowing that someone cares (either a caregiver, like YOU, or a medical practitioner, acupuncturist, or some other type of professional healer) is enough to prove to science that a healing takes place without the need for “medicine”. This is the success of the “the placebo effect.”

So believe it, folks! Mind is more important than medicine. But of course, we are lucky in today’s world to have access to both. People can also get REAL medical help (chemo, surgery, etc) besides the caring, loving attention of a friend, a spouse, caregiver, a team of experts–AND, most important–one’s one Self-Belief in Healing!

A lot of healing is from a person’s own MIND believing that we have the power to heal ourself!

love, LordFlea

Chapter 1: Ready, Set—COURAGE!

 

      Pretend that today is the first day of the rest of your life. Pretend that everything you ever thought true, isn’t, and that for the sake of experimentation only, you’re willing to try something new in your life. Why? Well, the payoff I’m promising is stupendous. You’ve heard of peace of mind. You’ve even met people who seem content with whatever life has brought them. You suspect some people, even if you haven’t met them, are not destroyed with bouts of seething anger or crippling anxiety every time things don’t go their way. You actually believe that some fortunate people in our stressful world get by without taking drugs, either prescribed or recreational. But … up till now … you haven’t been one of these types of people.

To you, life seems fraught with perils, dangers, exploitative people, oppressive governments, and toxic situations. You may feel powerless a great deal of the time. For these reasons you may have the tendency to drink, smoke, eat, shop, exercise, work, create drama, or some other unhealthy action in excess. But you don’t believe you have a problem. You just think “This is the way life is.”

You’re probably the type of person who believe that true happiness is rare, and probably just a fairytale. Or for airy-fairy types. Maybe you’re a hardcore realist and don’t believe in God. The first type of person usually doesn’t give the possibility of cosmic consciousness a nod of the head, and the later just hopes they’ll not mess up and get thrown in eternal damnation. Either type, neither one lives in a state of openness and is ruled by fears, whether disguised by intellectualism, philosophy, or religiosity.

Well, I can tell you right now that just by being interested in the subject of this book, “Maya’s Book of Change,” that you’re intrigued with the possibility of being transformed. Change is change. You wouldn’t want to stay the way you are if you’re reading about change. You may not believe change is intrinsically possible, but you’re willing to try that thought on for size and thus, you’re here, with me, reading these words.

getting ready to fly!

getting ready to fly!

Maya is my very sick, terminally ill friend whom I’ve dedicated this book to. Ahhh, but maya is also a Sanskrit word that means, loosely: The illusion this world is, this reality in which we live, the one that is only a play of consciousness, and not what we truly are.

And I’ll tell you right here what we really are.

All beings, living or dead, animate or inanimate, mineral, plant, vegetable, each and every thing in existence: we are all tiny cells within the fabric, the body of a much larger, almost incomprehensible matrix called the Universe. Whether you like it or not, my favorite analogy of what we truly are is … don’t laugh!… like microscopic flea-like critters that live upon a dog. The dog being the Universe in this ridiculous scheme, and the fleas are … well, you get the picture. It’s a stretch, but this is my experience and I’m trying to express something totally ineffable using lame words. Sorry.

Stick around and I’ll share best I can how I came to have this perspective, that is, by the way, not unique. The Oneness, or unity consciousness I speak of, is a very ancient approach to life, one that is recorded in much more esoteric and poetic (but almost incomprehensible) language in the yogic scriptures called the Vedas.

Don’t get me wrong! It’s not a smelly, low-existence being a flea-speck on a dog’s back. No, no no. Being a mere cell in the vastness of the One-that-Is, is what I lovingly, respectfully call being aware of The Big It. On the contrary, it’s quite a relief to know we’re all so connected, so familiar with everything in existence that we—whether “we” is another human or another life form, a plant, an animal, or another spinning gaseous galaxy lights years away—we are all connected. We are All One.

I have proof of this. And you will arrive at the same conclusion too if you stick with this inner journey I’m leading you on.

I know Oneness to be absolutely true, and all other beliefs are … just that. Other people’s beliefs. They just don’t hold up for many of us. Oneness is before religion was invented by man. Oneness will remain if and when humanity destroys itself, either over religious differences or crass indifference to our fragile ecosystem.

a vine of Oneness

a vine of Oneness

By the end of this book you will experience Oneness for yourself. I promise that if you follow all my suggestions and be willing to try, that your life will evolve into one with the daily experience of Oneness that is beyond your wildest expectations of what fulfillment can mean. Better than the most far-out aphrodisiac or euphoric formula for happiness, this Oneness stuff. Guaranteed you’ll throw away your anti-depressants, those anti-anxiety pills, bottles of booze, pizza and doughnuts, and relieving smokes. All your fears and hurdles that keep you from being the most significant person you can, in this lifetime you’ve been blessed with, will melt away when you start experiencing Oneness as your true reality.

The goal of this book is, nothing more and nothing less than to share with you the secret of life, and why life itself is such a gift, and how we can best use our time here, whatever length it might be we are granted to be alive.

One thing we can start by agreeing on:

Life is a gift.

Let’s not waste it.

(This is the 4th installment of “Maya’s Book of Change”)

hi friend,

i’ve been told by my teachers, and now have found it to be true–the only true happiness in life is when you serve others.  i’ve found this by…you got it!…being in a position to serve, or else!

lord flea serving the garden

lord flea serving the garden

my mom, who just turned 90 and for whom we just threw a grand, well-attended (over 70 people from all walks of life, all ages) surprise party, has been found to have a “leaky valve” in her ticker. 

mom at her party with her mike, her dentist and gloria, her fishing pal

mom at her party with mike, her dentist and gloria, her fishing pal

i’ve been lord flea’s jitney for her, going back and forth for the last 3 days to mayo clinic, an hour’s drive one way. many tests.  moniters. consultations, all a result of the very first sign of some physical challenge, new to eve, who’s always been healthy, always enjoying a med-free life for her 90 years.  up to now. 

serving mom as jitney, as companion, as selfless daughter and yes, friend, too, is indeed my pleasure, my honor, my delight.

it hasn’t always been like that though. 

our relationship has not been what i’d call a happy or very fulfilling one for either of us–until very recently.  not through any fault of hers.  i take total responsibility for our relationship having been so strained since i left home and became the adventuring gypsy i chose to be.  the onus of a good mother-daughter rapport has been totally mine.  truth is, i couldn’t be with her without crumpling in a heap of self-pity, anger, and horrible, crippling unresolved angst.  through working on myself, i got over this hurtful stage of “blame and shame.” 

first i had to get over my addictions, then i began to forgive mySelf, then finally i ended up doing “rapid eye movement therapy,” quite the buster of the deeply rooted neurotic triggers i had going with my mom all my adult life.

for years i had to stay away from all my family.  i simply was too angry to be any good to anyone, including mySelf.  when i was with her, we fought. i couldn’t get beyond the bad feelings that overwhelmed me by her habitual criticisms.  her well-intentioned comments triggered a certain madness within me, and i’d go berserk with anger, or insecurity–or both.  for literally decades i had bad times with her, or none at all. 

why?  i simply wasn’t ready, in those days, to let go of my resentments over the stupid silly childhood issues of mine, that I hadn’t yet figured how to resolve.  yipes!  how long do we have to work before we let go of things that hold us back?  for me it seemed ages before i stopped being pissed off!

the angelic Self within us all

always looking UP to getting beyond any drawbacks: the angelic Self within us all

but finally the day came when i said “i’m ready!  i surrender.” 

what did i surrender to?  i’m so glad you asked.  first i had to surrender to the addiction of putting mySelf down.  i had to learn to Love mySelf.  because LOVE is the only thing worth surrendering to.  Self love first, and then, afterwards, love for all others.  “see God in each other,” that’s my motto.  and now i know, by experiencing it, by continually practicing it (through positive thought, meditation, chanting, and other yogic practices) that by surrendering, i am truly victorious over any obstruction in my path, that i too, am perfectly worthy of experiencing happiness. 

now i’m no longer a slave to my anger, resentment–or (hardly) any of my old negative addictions, chemical or emotional.  i am glad to report that i am freed of the stupid silly, crippling feeling of separation, of being different that Love itSelf.  now, finally, my heart has melted entirely: i have learned to forgive mySelf for my shortcomings, and I have learned (and worked hard at) to forgive my mother for her shortcomings, too.

she only did what she knew best…and who am i to fault anyone, especially my own family, for not having done what i, little me, perceive to be best for me, for anyone?

maybe what was best for me, in the long run, was to have all the hardships, the alcoholic father, the trying-to-survive-alcoholism, critical mother; all the confusion, judgement, the crushing feelings of not being supported or acknowledged for who i felt i was–because what has resulted in this life of mine, from having experienced all these challenges (common to many), was to push myself to become the very best, the most true, most loving spiritual warrior that i can possibly become.

thus, i am yours truly, lord flea, writing this to you.  in hopes that it will touch you, and help you.

and for this, i am smiling-heart, soulfully grateful to my mother, and my departed dear father, but especially my sweet, sincere, and now scared of not being as healthy as she’d like to be, and used-to-be, ever-strong, ever-robust mother, eve.

in sacrificing my time, my energy, and my strength to uphold my mother during her personal crisis now, during this challenging time of hers, i add so much to my own emotional and spiritual stature.  i feel myself grow from giving.  i can feel the goodness of sacrificing my wishes, for hers, flow into my veins like an invigorating transfusion of oxygen into stale blood.

it’s one thing to say “i love you” to someone–to a mom, to a lover, to a friend.  but it’s entirely another thing, a more real, more magnificently human thing to actually “act out” the love by sacrificing, by sublimating our wishes to fulfill someone else’s needs. to make I Love You an active state of Being, a gesture of sacrifice, instead of merely a cliche, a trite, overused statement.

to give of our time, our funds, our life’s strength–for and to our love.

ahhhhh, it makes us so much more whole to give to others.  we become so much more human.  in doing so we also become so much more attuned to our highest potential.  truly, this is what all great scriptures from time immemorial, talk about when they mention how the state of “being human” is the closest to touching, to “being” and “actualizing” the state of the Divine. 

God dwells within all of us.  We are One.  we are all tiny cells within God’s universal body.

we are all cellular units within God's body...the Universe

we are all cellular units within God's body, the Universe

with great love, great respect, and great sacrifice–for each and every one of you, (my sharing is my sacrifice, in case you’re wondering what could she mean…sacrifice…what??? for me??)

your pal, lord flea

ps. next post i’ll talk about my time in savannah at the jazz festival, which i attended last weekend.  since then–i’ve been helping dear mom.